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By Sara Appel-Lennon
 SAN DIEGO— “Mourning Michael Jackson” was the subject heading of an email that I received recently from Rabbi Jeffrey Salkin, an author and teacher of Jewish spirituality based in Atlanta.
As I read his email, memories from the mid 1970s came flooding back when I watched the Jackson Five perform live in concert at the Front Row Theatre, where I graduated from Mayfield High School in an eastern suburb of Cleveland, Ohio.
After that concert, I splurged on a poster to pin those Jackson Five memories on my bedroom wall for posterity. The poster photograph was so true to life that the Jacksons looked like they were staring at me, particularly when I changed my clothes. Rather than remove the poster, I hid behind my closet to dress, because after all, I was a loyal fan.
Since the group was part of my youth, I felt shocked and saddened when I heard the news about the early demise of the King of Pop.
I returned to read Salkin's email with my full attention.
Salkin's email read:
There is an old Jewish saying: "The Angel of Death takes no vacation." Thus it must have seemed during this past week, as America said farewell to several celebrities, each one an icon in his or her own way: Ed McMahon., Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson.
For a variety of reasons, the death of Michael Jackson has attracted the most attention. Tributes have focused on his tremendous talent and energy - topics that are beyond my scope. (He also has children from Debbie Rowe, his
second wife who is Jewish - meaning that his children are, at least halachically, Jewish).
What do I find particularly interesting - as well as disturbing -- about Michael Jackson? Not only his alleged lack of boundaries and his bizarre ability to re-invent himself in a variety of ways, it's more than that. It was his absolute refusal to age, to retreat into a kind of Peter Pan-like
Shangri-La of the soul and of the flesh - even at significant personal and physical cost.
You will not be surprised to hear that Judaism has something to say about this. Despite the fact that Judaism has always cherished continuity and the birth of children, it has never been a child-centered faith. The great parental ambition was for their children to grow up and to take on matured
roles in the life of the community. This is the entire purpose of bar/batmitzvah. Moreover, age and wisdom was the crowning glory of the Jewish role model…
All of which leads me - and many of us - to a kind of sadness about Michael Jackson's death. Yes, the loss of a remarkably talented man, but also the waste of a life. In one sense,
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popular culture venerates and idolizes youth. But not always and certainly not in rock music. I love aging rock stars who
do not hide their aging. Paul Simon is 68. So is Bob Dylan. Mick Jagger is 65. Paul McCartney, who is coming to Atlanta in August, is 67. James Taylor, going deliciously bald (but I am biased, I admit), is 61. Some of them are grandfathers…
I was taken aback by Rabbi Salkin calling Jackson's death "the waste of a life." It sounded judgmental. I consulted a dictionary for a true definition of the word, "waste." The definition that surprisingly applied in the case of Jackson was "to allow to be used inefficiently or become dissipated, to spend money or consume property extravagantly, squander, to become consumed.”
I discussed Salkin's email with my husband. Waste of a life is subjective and it is not absolute. Perhaps we should ask: what life lessons can we draw from Jackson's tragic life resulting in his early demise?
The value of self-reflection came to mind when I remembered the following quote by Socrates "The unexamined life isn't worth living."
Judaism encourages introspection and the importance of living life in accordance with Jewish values. Part of the self-reflection process is becoming aware of how we have missed the mark and temporarily gotten off track. Every Shabbat we have a chance to reflect upon our actions of the past week.
Furthermore, Yom Kippur is a time when Jews all over the world think about their lives and how they can improve. It is a time when we as human beings make amends to others who we have wronged, so we can be forgiven, since as human beings we all sometimes commit wrongs.
In Catholicism, there is confession; in secular society we have New Year’s Resolutions. In Twelve-Step Programs, there is the fourth step of taking a moral inventory and the tenth step where people are asked to take a daily inventory.
Another take-home lesson from Jackson's trying life was his lack of limits and boundaries throughout his life.
As a former public school teacher, setting limits was a necessary but least favorite and most difficult part of my job. Ironically enough, I discovered that sometimes chanting Om while standing in a yoga tree pose attracted students' attention more than yelling because yelling only reinforced their negative behavior.
Socrates said "In childhood be modest, in youth temperate, in adulthood just, and in old age prudent." In keeping with that advice, rather than pointing blame at Michael Jackson, let's learn from his mistakes and apply these lessons to our own lives.
Being a responsible adult entails self-reflection and setting limits on our own wants and whims. As a result of these two qualities, we will be more able to live our lives in accordance with our Jewish values.
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