These are written by children and have not been retouched or corrected:

1. The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble with the unsympathetic Genitals.

2.  The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went on Mount Cyanide to get the ten amendments.

3. The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

4. The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.

5.  Moses died before he ever reached Canada.

6. Then Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle of Geritol.

7. David was a Hebrew king skilled at playing the liar. He fought with the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in Biblical times.

8.  Solomon, one of David's sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.

9. Most religions teach us to have only one spouse. This is called monotony.

—Humanews, monthly newsletter of  Humanistic Jewish Congregation of San Diego, October 2005, page 5.