As retold by Bruce Lowitt

Morty calls his best friend, Seymour, in Elmhurst. "Have I got a deal for you," he says.

"Already I'm suspicious," Seymour says.

"No, this is good. For one thousand dollars I'll sell you an elephant."

"An elephant? What am I going to do with an elephant?"
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"You'll sell kiddie rides. Six months, top, you make back your money."

"I don't want an elephant."

"Give me a listen. And also, with that schnoz, you could have the elephant wash cars."|

"No. Forget it.  No elephant."

"What's wrong with you? Don't you see a gold mine here? During the winter the elephant pulls cars out of the snow."

"Morty! I'm in a second-floor studio apartment. I'm allergic to peanuts. Stop already with the elephant! I'm not buying an elephant!"

"Wait a minute. How's about this. For two thousand dollars I can get you THREE elephants."

And Seymour says, "Aha, now you're talking business."