As retold by Bruce Lowitt

Goldberg has been elected the first Jew to be President of the United States. He calls his mother in New York and invites her to the inauguration.

"Harry, you know how I hate to ride trains. All the way to Washington is too much. Maybe some other time."

"Momma, don't worry about the train! Air Force One will fly you down. It'll take 30 minutes."

"Harry, you know how I feel about staying alone in a hotel room and eating room service."

"Momma, you will stay in the White House and a kosher chef will make whatever you want."

"Harry! I have nothing to wear."

"Momma, someone will be there tomorrow to take you Bloomingdale's. You'll buy whatever you want. My office will take care of it, okay? Please come!"

"Well, okay, okay, I'll come."

She hangs up, calls her friend Rose and says, "My son has invited me to stay with him next month."

"You're going to visit Ben in Fort Lauderdale?"

"No, not the dentist. The other one."